


Letters and Actions

by NyxDeLaNuit



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Broken Families, Cheating, F/M, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-23
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:07:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24882814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NyxDeLaNuit/pseuds/NyxDeLaNuit
Summary: You were happily married to Tanaka until the cameras caught the end of a conversation you weren't supposed to hear.Now Noya's left with the pieces, and he'll put you back together, no matter what it takes.
Relationships: Nishinoya Yuu/Reader, Shimizu Kiyoko/Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Tanaka Ryuunosuke/Reader
Comments: 10
Kudos: 309





	1. Letters

You read each line, like it was poetry. The words didn’t seem to stick in your head, instead, fading to the interview you had watched earlier in the day. You always watched, for him, for your husband, the father to your two sweet children that were asleep in their bed, unaware of the turmoil you were facing.

You were watching from the comfort of the home he had bought, his job so much more profitable than any you could manage—perks of being part of a professional volleyball team. Your youngest was perched on your hip, just old enough to recognize their daddy on the screen. It always warmed your heart, watching your husband’s team joke around with each other post-game, your husband was always last to know that the camera was focused on them for the post-game interviews. Tsukishima, ever the antagonist, was egging him on, a coy smile plastered on his face.

You were content to keep watching until you hear the timbre of your husband’s voice cry out, “Well, it’s my dick Kiyoko is riding every night, so fuck off.” Pushing Tsukishima away from him. Oh. Oh… He had always told you how big of a crush he had on her in high school. It shouldn’t have been this surprising, but you never expected it would hurt this much. The pain only worsened when you watched Tsukishima cast a guilty glance at the cameras, as if he was trying to apologize to you already. There was just enough time for you to watch the blood drain from Tanaka’s face before you saw Noya, your sweet partner-in-crime, Tanaka’s best friend, lunge toward Tanaka with murder in his eyes. The feed cut off abruptly, leaving you in awkward silence, the child that suddenly looked too much like his father tugging on your hair.

Another letter fed to the fire. You understood when you married Tanaka that he’d be gone a lot. Away games were much more common than home games, after all. You had letters postmarked from the world round, and each were glanced over. Bittersweet memories clouded your mind, each piece of paper just another log on the pyre for your marriage. So lost in your thoughts, you hadn’t heard someone moving through your house. You only caught a glimpse of his shadow in the corner of your eye before you spoke.

“Stop. I don’t want you any closer.” You were proud that your voice didn’t shake as you glanced at him. Noya deserved one of his favorite dinners in exchange for the purple blooming across Tanaka’s face, a favor you would be sure to repay.

“Baby, I-” You cut him off with a hand, throwing another letter to the fire.

“I don’t want to hear your excuses. I should have expected it, really. Everyone sees how you look at her.” Your eyes scanned over another letter, the exclamations of love from your husband now turning your stomach like poison. Tanaka flinched as the flames licked the edges of the paper, as if he was burning along with it.

Each moment he stood, defeated, only caused your anger to grow. In a moment of rage, you threw the remaining handfuls into the fire, not shying away from the jumping flames.

“Did you bring her here?” You couldn’t keep the venom from your voice, “Did you sleep with her in our bed?” The flash of guilt on his face was answer enough. “So I was just a placeholder then? Some sort of sick consolation prize?” Your finger poked into his sternum, and you tried to forget how warm he really was. How cold the nights would be without him in your bed.

Your bed. If you could, you’d burn that too. Looks like you’re sleeping on the couch until you could order a replacement. Any hesitation you had felt before disappeared, and you pulled yourself back as he tried to reach for your arms.

"I packed a bag for you. You should go.” He was still reaching out for you, and you wondered if you’d be strong enough to leave his arms once they wrapped around you. You must, so you shrug away his touch, the threat of tears hanging heavily on your lashes. Still, he tried to get closer, and you reacted… badly. You threw your arms out, trying to push him away, a word yet to be said from your husband. He knew there was nothing he could say to make up for any of it anyways.

You struggled against his hold and against the tears flooding your vision. You couldn’t give him that satisfaction.

“I understand doing this to me, but how could you do this to your kids, Ryu?” You swallowed past the lump in your throat, willing away the hurt in your voice. “They’re not going to understand why Daddy isn’t coming home. How could you.” You pushed even harder, trying to get away from him until a hand wrapped around his shoulder.

Noya. You were never more relieved to see him than you were now. He cast you a sad glance before leading Tanaka out, out of your house, out of your life. With the final click of the door behind them, you finally let yourself fall apart. Your arms came up to wrap around you, trying to hold yourself together, to keep yourself somewhat contained. It would only hurt your kids if they woke to see you like this.

You weren’t sure how you’d do this alone. People were going to have questions, they would look at you with pity in their eyes—the single mother whose husband cheated on her and slept with his manager. The house never felt colder, more distant.

Lithe arms wrapped around you when you were lost in your thoughts, startling you out of your head. They were leaner, more scarred, than the ones you were used to, but comforting all the same. He tucked your head under his chin, whispering soft, consoling words to you. Your sobs quieted as he rubbed circles into your back. You had thought Noya left with Tanaka, best friends even through this.

But he was here. Maybe you weren’t as alone as you thought.


	2. Actions

He had always been there in the background. Watching, holding you up. Playing the part of your boyfriend’s best friend. Noya didn’t know when it happened, but he found his eyes falling to you more and more, Kiyoko all but forgotten. He wasn’t dumb though, he kept up the facade. It wouldn’t do you any good to figure out all the forbidden feelings he had for you. Not when you looked so happy every time Tanaka twirled you in his arms.

And so he watched, convincing himself it was enough to be there for you. In some ways, he became closer to you than your husband. Noya prided himself on being your partner-in-crime, your confidant. He knew there were a million other people you could confide in, especially when it came to Tanaka, but he was your first call without fail. He had even been the first person to meet your second-born, gripping your hand while Tanaka was stuck in traffic. The three of you laughed at the time, calling Noya your surrogate husband.

That night, he cried for hours. For a moment, he had forgotten you weren’t his, that the life you created wasn’t tied to him. Noya had tried, unsuccessfully, to fill the void in his heart. Every person he brought into his bed felt hollow, his hand holding more meaning. At least then, he wouldn’t get slapped for slipping out your name.

All his patience, all he had given up, all for nothing when he heard the words that had fallen from Tanaka’s mouth. To think he had called him his friend, his brother? Noya moved before he thought, cradling his fist as he watched Tanaka reel. It was only fitting that he feel even a fraction of the heartache Noya felt. The heartache you would feel. Noya was ready to deliver more justice, until Tanaka’s eyes could no longer fall on you. He no longer deserved that. But Tsukishima was pulling him away.

The rage faded enough that Noya was once aware of his surroundings. Tsukishima held Noya, Noya’s back to his chest.

“Stop, you know she’s watching.” Noya’s eyes drifted to the cameras, where Ukai was desperately trying to get them to cut the feed. He needed to move, he needed to get to you before anyone else. He was your rock, he couldn’t not be there. Tsukki wouldn’t let him leave, not yet, and Noya slumped in his hold. With a clearer head, he surveyed the court.

The Karasuno team had been divided. Kiyoko knelt at Tanaka’s side, fussing over the blood oozing from his nose in lazy twin rivers. Between Noya and them stood the team, tense and incensed. On the other side of the net, he heard struggling. Before all this, before you had fallen pregnant with your first, you had been Nekoma’s manager. You had only quit because Tanaka was worried about having both parents be so busy, and you were quick to tell him that his dreams were worth more.

A glance over Tsukki’s shoulder showed Kuroo holding Yaku much the same that Tsukki held him. Yaku wasn’t as quickly talked down, throwing elbows in the poor man’s face. While Yaku may have been the avatar of their rage, Kenma was staring Tanaka down, the embodiment of their vengeance. Murder shone in his eyes, calm and patient and bloodthirsty.

What surprised him the most, though, was Yachi. Kind, timid Yachi. As soon as Kiyoko got Tanaka back on his feet, Yachi marched over to them, more confidence oozing from her than Noya had ever seen. The loud smack reverberated through the echoing room, and Kiyoko held her cheek, tears in her eyes.

“You ignored him for years! We all watched you! But now that he has a life, a wife, you decide that you want him? He has children! I looked up to you? How could you?” Each word sunk into Kiyoko and Tanaka like knives, guilt, and pain written in the hunch of their backs and the subtle steps to put distance between them. Distance wouldn’t fix this, not now.

Ukai finally returned, the camera team packing up awkwardly in the background. He pushed Yachi behind him with a hand on his shoulder, muttering words of comfort as she strode past.

“I’ll be expecting a letter of resignation from the both of you by the end of the week. Extramarital affairs and mingling between coworkers doesn’t break your contracts, but I doubt you’ll be welcome on the team for a long time.” With his peace said, Ukai turned from them, ushering the rest of the teams off the court.

The chill of the night air brought a sense of finality to what had happened. Both teams, earlier amped up by friendly rivalry, now brought together with a common cause. There had been some heated discussion, arguments on who would go to you. Yamaguchi and Suga were adamant about accompanying Noya to your house, and although Kenma didn’t speak a word, he stood resolutely by Noya’s side. It wasn’t often that Kenma found fondness for other people, but you had his undying loyalty.

It was Daichi that finally spoke some sense into them. “She won’t want all of us showing up at her doorstep. I know you guys mean well, but she won’t want your pity. For now, let’s leave her in Noya’s hands. We all know he’s closest to her.” Noya could feel the weight of the responsibility sitting heavily on his shoulders, but it was one he would carry without complaint. Kuroo approached to place a hand on Kenma’s shoulder.

“That means you too. Let’s put our faith in him.” Kenma turned away with a scowl.

“We put our faith in Tanaka, look how that turned out.” He lumbered into the night, Kuroo following with a hurried apology. The remainder of the team dispersed slowly after, murmuring encouragement to Noya as they left. Sometime during that, Noya noticed Tanaka and Kiyoko retreating from a side door, slipping quickly out of sight.

Noya had hoped he wasn’t too late as he approached your door, thankful it was unlocked. He had a key, hidden somewhere in the bag slung over his shoulder, but he didn’t want to waste precious time hunting it down if he didn’t have to.

Noya caught the end of your tirade, simultaneously heartbroken and proud of the strength you were showing. He led Tanaka out of his house, throwing the bag after him without a word. Noya thought the ache in his chest couldn’t be any worse, and he was proved wrong once he saw you desperately trying to hold yourself together, collapsed in the spot he had left you in.

How many nights had he fantasized holding you like this? Tucked under his chin, grasping at his shirt? Now those daydreams made him feel all the more guilty. This was not what he wished for, nothing at the expense of your happiness. Noya vowed to himself as he felt you shake in his hold, he would never try to be more than you needed. If this was his karma for wanting after you, he’d hold his tongue until the world died out.

Noya’s arms started to ache, but you had finally stilled. With careful movements, he lifted you into his arms, thanking whatever deity granted him that growth spurt his final year of high school. He laid you on the couch, wishing the fabric was more plush against your swollen face. He stepped lightly through the house, grateful for his previous visits. With a washcloth in hand, he returned to your sleeping form, cleaning the angry tear lines from your face. The blanket draped over the back of the couch was moved to cover you, Noya remembering with a smile that you always slept with one foot outside of the covers and adjusting it to your liking.

Once he was satisfied, he simply sat on the floor, his head propped up on the couch cushion to watch you. Even in sleep, you didn’t look peaceful. What he wouldn’t do to wipe the creases from your brow, to at least know your dreams were treating you sweetly.

You awoke in waves the next morning. At first, the gentle kiss of morning sun begged your eyes to open. They felt so heavy, and yet you couldn’t remember why. Then the rough texture of the cushion under your head made you wonder why you weren’t in bed with your husband. Then the grating realization that you didn’t have much of a husband left.

The ache in your chest returned, only softened by the sight of Noya, passed out inches from where your head had lain. His hair still half-gelled, half-matted by his arms cradling his head. Even without Tanaka, you weren’t as alone as you feared. You took the time to take him in while he slept. He was your dearest friend, but you hadn’t let yourself linger on him like this—too much temptation for a taken woman. You had always thought in another life, maybe you would have met him first. You wish you had.

Your eyes fell to the color blooming on his knuckles, crusty reds flaking over blacks and angry violet. He had already done so much more than you could have asked. Your body started moving on autopilot, and you let the numbness consume you. You couldn’t afford to fall apart, your children still needed a mother.

Noya woke up while you were in the kitchen, softly plodding his way over to you. You poured him a cup of coffee, cream and sugar, just like how he liked it. He accepted it with a grateful groan, emptying almost half before he started to come alive.

“Is'okay if I use your shower?” You nodded your approval before returning to the food on the stove. It would be best to finish this before the kids woke up. You had almost made it in time, your daughter running through the hall to tell you her brother had woken her up. You ran a hand through her hair, unable to look at her father’s eyes staring up at you. Hopefully she wouldn’t read too much into it, she was far to smart to be five. Your body moved on muscle memory as you got your two-year-old son ready for the day, setting him up at the table while your daughter dutifully slid into her seat. You set out their plates, cutting the food into palatable pieces for them before placing plates down for you and Tanaka.

Shit.

Luckily, Noya slid into the room then, hair dropping around his face without the stash of gel he came at home. “You didn’t have to make me food, but I won’t say no.” His grin sparked something within your heart, lifting the ache that threatened to choke you. You didn’t correct him, instead taking your seat and enjoying what you could of the meal.

Noya shooed you out of the kitchen once you were done. “I’ll watch the little scamps while you get ready. We can worry about the dishes later.” You let yourself be corralled by him, realizing now that you were still in last night’s crumpled clothes. Noya slipped your son into his hold with the comfort of someone who had been there since his beginning, chatting animatedly with your daughter as he did. Despite listening to her chatter, his eyes still sought your retreating form. He watched as you paused at the door to your room, your hand shaking as it reached for the handle. The pain on your face rivaled what he had seen last night. Something he hoped he could fix.

You kept your eyes to the ground as you traversed your room by memory. Clothes were grabbed without thought, and once you had what you needed, you ran from the offending room. You hadn’t meant to slam the door behind you, but it still shook the frame. Your son’s cries echoed from the living room, followed by Noya’s soothing. He quieted soon after, but it was just another thorn in your heart.

You cried in the shower, trusting the water to drown out your shaking sobs. It felt cathartic, like you were washing Tanaka from your skin, his scent from your hair, and the pain from your heart. It wouldn’t be a cure-all, but it would be a start. You left the water feeling like more of a person, noticing the wrung-out washcloth sitting at the edge of the sink. Vague memories of Noya cleaning the evidence of your break from your face flooded your mind. What you had ever done to have someone like him in your life, you would never know.

You allowed him to distract your kids today as you lost yourself in thought. There was so much to do, but where would you get the energy. Before you knew it, the day had passed, settling into dusk.

“Noya, don’t you have practice tonight?” You mused aloud, eyes lazily drifting to his. He grinned at you sheepishly as he wiggled your son in his hold.

“Nah, I’m off the team for a month or two. Guess you can’t punch someone on live TV without getting in trouble.” He laughed it off, but the guilt only grew.

“You don’t have to stay.” Your eyes fell to the cold cup of tea in your hands, fingers stiff. How long had you held this while it cooled? When had you even gotten it? Noya extracted himself from your daughter’s hold, making sure your son was settled on his play mat before coming to take the cup from your hands.

“I’ll stay as long as you want me to. I want to be here.” He didn’t allow you to answer, traipsing into the kitchen as if it was his own. You followed him with your eyes, the dishes from breakfast, and a lunch you hadn’t remembered eating already washed and dried. You worried for a moment before noticing the splotch of food dried to your son’s shirt. At least they had been fed, somehow. Noya returned, a steaming cup of tea deposited in your grasp. The warmth brought feeling back into your aching fingers.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I told a couple of the guys they could stop by. They were worried about you.” You nodded as he reached into his pocket, his phone vibrating. “That’s them now.”

You must have zoned out again. Kenma sat in front of you, replacing the tea with his hands. His eyes saw too much, and you were tempted to turn away. You wondered if that would answer the questions he had. Instead of prying, he led your hands to his hair, letting you fuss with the dyed locks. You had always loved playing with his silken hair, and for a moment, a piece of normalcy returned to you.

Kuroo sat on the love seat with Noya, one eye on your kids as he went over papers with Noya, who nodded to his explanations. He caught your gaze and shot you a soft smile. Kenma noticed the pause in your touch, reaching out to splay his upper body over your lap. His arms wrapped around your waist, hiding his face in your stomach. Embers burned in your chest, a fondness that overcame your grief.

They stayed late into the night, Kenma not releasing his hold on you even as your daughter knotted ‘braids’ into his hair. He only let you go once you noticed your son nodding off as he played. Your kids were unusually compliant tonight, your son quickly falling into sleep once his head hit his mattress. Your daughter changed herself and slid into her bed, waiting for you to tuck her in.

“Mama, where’s daddy?” The question hurt, even if you knew it was coming. The words caught in your throat. Kuroo came up behind you, a hand settling comfortingly on your back.

“Pumpkin, Daddy hurt Mommy. What happens when you hurt someone?” He ran a hand through your daughter’s hair as she thought.

“You go to time-out.” Kuroo chuckled.

“You’re a smart girl. Daddy is in time-out, he can’t come back for a while. But you’ve got your mama, Noya, and all your other uncles. If you start feeling lonely, just ask to call one of us, and we’ll come cheer you up. But you got to be good for your mama, got it?”

“Got it!” You finished tucking her in, placing a kiss to her forehead. Kuroo led you out of their room, shutting off the light as he went.

“We gotta head out, but we’re here for you, whatever you need.” He held your hands as he stood in your doorway, placing a kiss on your hairline. “Seriously, anything.” You nodded, hugging him close to you. You turned to Kenma after you released him, catching the angry whispers he directed at Noya. Kenma flushed as he noticed your confused look, clapping Noya on the arm before diving into your hold. His hands smoothed down your hair, holding you as if you were a doll. He wasn’t one for many words, and even less in situations like this, but you could feel his hesitance.

“I’ll be fine.” You soothed him as you pulled away, letting Kuroo lead him out into the night.

Noya was a constant at your side, but with the departure of your Nekoma boys, you noticed he had not touched you all day. It set an uneasy weight in your stomach, but you decided not to dwell on it.

“You should get to bed, it’s pretty late.” Noya waved you off as he made toward the couch. You froze at the beginning of the hallway. “Kitkat?” The words sparked sweet nostalgia in you.

Noya hadn’t called you that since you and Tanaka had gotten engaged. It started out as a flirty little joke when you were Nekoma’s manager. “Hey Kitty Cat, you’re pretty cute!” He had cheered from across the court. Even after he finally got your name from Tanaka, he kept on catching your attention with the nickname, eventually shortening it down as you got closer. You hadn’t realized how much you had missed it.

“Kitkat?” His voice was right behind you now.

“I can’t, Noya. I can’t sleep in that bed… not knowing he…” You trailed off, hoping he wouldn’t make you explain.

“Take the couch; I can fit myself onto the love seat or the floor.” Usually, you’d fight this, but the anger threading through his voice killed off any argument you had. His knuckles were white as you walked past, nails biting into his palms. You tried to get comfortable on the couch, watching Noya as he walked past the love seat towards the door. “I’ll be back in a minute, I’ve got to make some calls.”

It had been almost a week now, and you’ve almost settled into a routine. Noya still kept his distance, much to your dismay, but he kept the kids out of your hair as you tried to piece together the remnants of your life. You were unsure how to move forward… divorce, house payment, you would need to get a job and find childcare… It was overwhelming.

Noya could see it weighing on you, and so he called in some favors. While you cleaned up the remnants of lunch, he snuck into your room. It looked cold and barren, and he could understand why you were so averse to it. Still, he slipped into your closets, thumbing through the hangers until he put together something decent. He surprised you with your outfit as soon as you finished dishes.

“Put it on, we’re going out and then to dinner. And don’t argue, it’s your favorite.” Your eyes strayed to the kids playing in the living room, already exhausted at the thought of getting them ready, but Noya’s grin only grew wider.

By the time you changed, two familiar faces, Daichi and Suga, were sprawled out on your living room floor. They had let the kids crawl all over them as they waited. Suga was the first to stand, cooing at your son before coming to wrap his arms around you.

“Go have fun, sweet girl.” He whined against your hair. “You deserve to go have a good time. We’ll be right here with your precious babies.” Daichi joined him soon, your daughter still hanging off an arm. He gave you a side hug, still swinging her around.

“It’s good to see you again.” That was all he was able to get out before Noya broke through the two of you.

“Alright, we got plans to keep, see you guys later.” He cheered, dragging you away by your arm. You’d tell him off for being rude, but your heart was too happy. He was touching you again.

As soon as the door shut behind you, Daichi took out his phone.

“Yeah, they just left. Be careful, don’t let them see you.”

While you were out, enjoying a perfectly mundane day with Noya- complete with your arm tucked into his elbow- the rest of the remaining Karasuno team got to work. A small moving truck backed into your driveway, and the boys wasted no time in unloading their haul.

With Daichi at the helm, they worked like a well-oiled machine. Your bedroom was cleared out in minutes, anything that could possibly remind you of Tanaka stripped. Yachi was in charge of sorting and putting away all of your clothes while packing away anything of Tanaka’s in big brown boxes.

Hinata and Kageyama were delegated to babysitting, Daichi not trusting them to not accidentally break any of the new furniture they had bought. They being Noya. Daichi was never blind to the way Noya had treated you, and he couldn’t be prouder how Noya was stepping up to care for you without expecting anything in return. Being the secret romantic he was, Daichi hoped something might bloom between the two of you. Until then, he watched exasperatedly as Hinata let your daughter draw 'makeup’ on his face. Kageyama, on the other hand, simply stared at your son, unsure of what to do, while your son stared back, big eyes focused on his hair.

Suga and Asahi already got to work, painting the walls a delicate color to bring more light into the room. Ennoshita mirrored them, painting the far wall a dark grey, to make the room feel a little more spacious and give the room some contrast. Tsukki and Yamaguchi worked in tandem in the living room, putting together nightstands and dressers, and Daichi was left to put together the frame for your new bed.

Tsukki worked quietly, eyes darting towards Hinata, Kageyama, and your kids. His brow furrowed, and he tried to throw himself into his busy work.

“Tsukki, what’s wrong?” Trust Yamaguchi to tell when something was bothering him.

“The kids. They won’t know why that idiot isn’t coming back.”

“Tsukki, you know it’s not your fault, right?” Tsukki simply huffed, trying to fight the tears building in his eyes.

“Of course, it’s my fault. If I hadn’t goaded him like I always do, this wouldn’t have happened!” He knew he should shut up, he knew his yelling would scare the kids. He couldn’t stop. “If I had just kept to myself, I wouldn’t have broken their family apart.” Tsukishima almost jumped at the feeling of a hand on his shoulder, but turned anyways to see Hinata. Your daughter was occupying herself with trying to put Kageyama’s hair into ponytails, content to ignore Tsukishima.

“But Tsukki, we’re their family too. We won’t let anything happen to them, right?” Tsukishima scoffed, pulling his shoulder from Hinata’s grasp. But he was right, if anything happened, Tsukki would jump to help without thought. How pathetic he’d become, how soft for these idiots.

It embarrassed him to see that people had worked their way out from his room, even worse was the soft smiles they held as they watched him. “What’s one dad when you have a small army of uncles, huh?” Daichi grinned, pulling Tsukishima down to his level to muss up his hair.

They worked quickly, moving fans and opening windows to help dry out the paint. The bed was assembled in the room, the dressers and closets filled with your clothes, nightstands scattered with your possessions. Noya even had the foresight to order you a vanity, something you had lacked prior. You were going to kill him if you ever found out how much money he had dropped on this.

But Noya was never happier to spend money. He lived as a bachelor for so long, not committing to buying a house or luxury cars, just his work. The two of you had finally finished your dinner, your ghost of a smile growing steadier as the night went on.

Noya was typing away quickly on his phone, tilting the screen away from you each time.

“Noya, do you finally have a girlfriend?” You tried to tease past the uncomfortable ache in your chest. You wanted his attention so badly, but you also just wanted him to be happy.

“You know you’re the only girl I look at, Kitkat.” His voice was distracted as he finished up his message, he had probably not even noticed what he had said. He slipped his phone into his pocket, full attention back on you. “Why are you looking at me like that? Did I say something dumb again?” He laughed, and you shrugged, tucking that information away for later.

It was definitely a surprise when you opened the door, all of the Karasuno boys plus a few others lounging all over your couches and floor. Along with the familiar boys, Kuroo, Kenma, Yaku, and Akaashi sat at your dining room table, papers strewn across its surface.

It took you a good fifteen minutes to get past your entryway, each boy coming to tell you how much of a dick Tanaka was and how they were your family. Hugs and shoulder nudges abound, but it was Tsukishima that surprised you the most. He hung back, like usual. But once everybody parted to let you through, you found him bowed to the floor.

“Tsukki, what are you doing?” You knelt down to touch his shoulder.

“This is all my fault. I’m so sorry.” It struck a nerve in you to hear proud Tsukki like this.

“I’m sorry, did you stick his dick in her?” He didn’t lift his head.

“No?”

“Did you dare him to stick his dick in her?” He finally looked up at this, aghast. You desperately tried to ignore Kuroo’s hyena cackling as you said this.

“Of course not!” You took this opportunity to wrap your arms around him.

“Then I don’t see how it’s your fault. You did nothing wrong.” You held him as he shook, hiding his teary eyes in your shoulder. His hand twisted in the fabric on your back as he tried to hold back his sobs. You stroked his back, urging him to let out all the guilt he had been feeling.

Tsukki left shortly after he calmed down, Yamaguchi making apologies and excuses for the both of them. You understood more than you thought you would, expecting him to show his face in a few days.

You let the boys lead you to the kitchen, overwhelmed with the papers in front of you. They formed a tight circle around you as Kurroo and Akaashi sat down.

“Kuroo and I have been speaking with lawyers on your behalf. Sorry for going behind your back.” Akaashi started bluntly.

“We’re getting it set up so you can keep the house, alimony, the whole shebang. The Nekoma team has decided to chip in and cover all the expenses until the divorce is final.” Kuroo continued, guiding you through the legal jargon with Akaashi’s help. “We can file this as soon as you give the go-ahead.” Tears welled up in your eyes, and you were unsure if it was the ache in your heart or how grateful you were to have all of them in your life.

Kenma made himself known at your side, slipping his hands up to your face to wipe the tears flowing down your cheeks. “Don’t try to say you can’t accept our help. You might be part of the crow’s family now, but you were ours first. We take care of our own.” He placed a chaste kiss on your cheek, driving away the last of your tears as you nodded.

“Let’s do it. I’m ready. I just want to move on.” The boys erupted into cheers around you, and to your delight, Noya wrapped you up in his arms, spinning you around the room. Your laughs joined his own, spreading a sense of happiness through your house for the first time in weeks.

“Before we go, there’s one more thing we want to show you.” Daichi’s voice cut through the celebration. He took your hand, eagerly pulling you toward the door you’ve been trying to avoid. “It should air out until tomorrow night, but I hope you’ll be able to sleep in your room again.” He opened the door, Suga and Asahi standing excitedly behind you.

This time you could tell it was happy tears. The smell of paint still clung heavily to the air, but your room looked wholly transformed. How they did this in a few hours, you’d never guess. You could have spent hours crying about how you didn’t deserve this, or them, and throwing yourself onto the nearest person to cry into their shoulder, but Noya pulled you away from them after a while.

“It’s been a long day guys, thanks for all your hard work!” He smiled although his tone was an absolute dismissal.

You rose early the next morning, already excited to go to bed that night. It seemed silly, and you were sure a handful of years ago you would have thought the idea ridiculous, but the pull of your new room, new bed, new everything put you in such a good mood.

Noya woke to the smell of pancakes and bacon, and you, with a huge smile as you hummed in the kitchen. He swore he had never seen a more beautiful sight. Your hair was a tangled mess, the shirt you wore to bed was stained and wrinkled, and he couldn’t be more in love with you. How traitorous his heart was to make him fall even more for you now.

That day was the easiest yet, by far. The house was full of smiles and laughter, your kids definitely picked up on your mood change. Noya rolled around with them on the floor, all four of you painted pictures in the backyard, you didn’t even mind the syrup that your daughter poured all over the couch. It was time for a new one, anyways.

By the time night fell, you felt so full that you had almost forgotten you’d be sleeping alone. You settled in between the sheets just fine, turning off the light on your nightstand. And then you just stared. It felt different, it felt new, and it felt… lonely. You tried to fight your instinct to reach out to Noya, but it was too much. Especially thinking about how gross the couch must be, the covers tossed in the washer with nothing but a thin sheet separating him from the coarse foam.

You moved without thought, startling a half-asleep Noya as he lounged on the couch. “What’s the matter, Kitkat?” He yawned half-way through, but alert on your face.

“Come with me.” You grabbed his hand, and he followed without hesitation.

“Okay, I see your nice new bedroom. What’s wrong with it?” He tried to trail his sleepy eyes around the room, looking for anything out of place.

“Sleep with me tonight?” That woke him up. His eyes widened, and surely you hadn’t imagined the way he cared for you. As soon as the words processed in his head, he pulled his arm away from you, harsher than he intended. He turned his face so as not to see the hurt written in your eyes.

“That’s not a good idea. Not now, at least.”

“Why? Please don’t make me spend any more nights alone, Noya.” You felt tears bubbling up, choking the words in your throat.

“I don’t want to be another guy that hurts you.” He bit at his lip, obviously hurting himself as well.

“Yuu, please.”

“Don’t. Please, don’t. Don’t say my name like that.” He all but begged you. You didn’t understand. Had you messed everything up? Did you just imagine that he loved you? Like… like you had with Tanaka?

Noya escaped to the living room, unable to leave you entirely alone even after this. For the first time since he started staying at your house, he listened to you cry yourself to sleep. Each sob was another stab to his tender heart, and he was torn between feeling like he was doing the right thing and that he just ruined everything.

The two of you pretended it never happened. You moved around each other seamlessly. It was easier having him there, a comfort. You just never imagined what would happen when he was gone.

It had been almost four months since Tanaka declared to the world he had cheated on you. There were no calls, no visits with his children. According to his lawyer during the divorce proceedings, Tanaka was planning on moving out of the country. Somewhere else, where he could start his career over. You were a bit thrilled to see the lack of Kiyoko in his life, as petty as that may have been. With your very extended family behind you, you finalized the case, uncontested. You had gotten everything you wanted.

Almost.

Almost everything.

It seemed immediately after Noya was due to rejoin the team for practice. You had one more weekend with him in your home, one day that was eaten up by a party thrown together by Suga. Such little time and so much left unsaid.

You managed to keep yourself together through the party. Suga had gone all out, buying a tiered cake and wedding toppers only to melt the groom off. It had been a lovely day filled with the warmth and love of your family- both cat and crow… and Akaashi… and Bo…

As they filtered out of your house at dusk, Suga pulled you aside. Making sure Noya was preoccupied with making sure your daughter didn’t face plant into what remained of the cake, he slipped a piece of paper into your hand.

“The only reason we thought to redo your room was because Noya thought of it. He also paid for all of it, out of pocket. Thought you might want to know.” He shot you a wry grin, kissing your cheek before jogging out towards Daichi’s car.

You unfolded the piece of paper in your hands, absolutely appalled by the number at the end of the receipt. Now, this had to be proof…

The kids were put to bed early that night, not that they knew that. You had a day and a half to convince Noya of your feelings. You weren’t going down without a fight.

You allowed both of you to unwind, the excitement from the day bleeding into a calm night. Noya was setting up his makeshift bed on the couch when you slipped in next to him, legs brushing against each other. Even this little contact had an effect on him now that you were watching. Wordlessly you passed him the receipt. He muttered a curse under his breath, running a hand through his ungelled hair.

“Who told you?”

“Does it matter?” He sighed at that answer.

“I’m not letting you pay me back.”

“Do you love me?” His words sputtered in his throat.

“Of course I love you, we all do!” He wouldn’t meet your eyes, afraid of what they might show.

“You know that’s not what I meant.” You watched him closely, resisting the urge to reach out as tears began cascading down his face.

“Don’t make me say it, please…”

“I used to wonder, back when I first married Tanaka,” you hadn’t spoken his given name since the day he left, “What would have happened if I had met you first. If I had fallen for you first, instead of him.”

“For me… first?” You nodded, allowing Noya to take that information in. “For me first like… like you love me?”

“Of course, I love you.” You knew it wasn’t fair to tease him, repeating his own words back.

“I’ve always loved you.” His voice is tight as he admits the secret he’s been holding back.

“I think I’ve always known.” You allow yourself a touch at first, a hand on his. “Sleep with me?”

This time he doesn’t pull away, but follows. He’s not sure he understands everything, or really anything at all, but he trusts you not to lie to him. Just like he couldn’t lie to you. The two of you slip into silken sheets, stiff at first. But then his hand cradles your head just like he did the first night, bringing it to rest under his chin. His arm, lithe, lean, and more scarred than ones you had known slipped around your waist to pull you flush with his chest. Legs tangled, breathing shared, and comfort at long last found.

“Don’t leave.” You whisper into his collarbone, unsure if he’s still awake above you.

“You couldn’t make me leave if you tried.” He pulls back, and you were afraid for a moment that it was all a sick joke, but his lips found their way to yours instead. It was softer than you expected, tender. More of a promise of kisses to come than anything else. Satisfied, he smiled against your hair, breathing in the scent of something floral he couldn’t place, mixed with something earthy and bold and entirely you. Something he only got a taste of when you walked beside him or wrapped your arms around his shoulders. Now it was ingrained in his senses, and he’d never let it go. Never let you go.

He stayed awake as you slipped easily to slumber. The moon coming through the window gave him enough light to look upon your face as he did that first night, but this time he didn’t resist the urge to smooth the crease in your forehead, lulling you into a peaceful sleep. With a last press of his lips to your forehead, he follows, eager for what the morning would bring.


End file.
